Snacktime for Shuman the Human

 

 

Dude! Have you ever wished you could take like two of your favorite things and smoosh them together to make something even more awesome? MEE TOOO!!! Or, in this case, something in the same vein that might not be AS awesome but is close enough?

 

Shuman the Human is what I can only speculate (obviously…) may have happened if an Emmylou Harris & Gram Parsons obsessed Syd Barrett had befriended Belle and Sebastian and The Beachwood Sparks while snacking on graham crackers and apple juice… Continue reading Snacktime for Shuman the Human

A Brief History of The Caldonias

 

 

Who the hell are these betches?!? In their own words, “so its basically like this…. bob plays guitar the way nadia sings and nadia sings the way bob plays guitar. and sydney….she fucking gets it man.”

 

In case that doesn’t sell you, lemme give you my version:

 … Continue reading A Brief History of The Caldonias

From Birch Book and In Gowan Ring to Natalie Portman in 108 words.

 

 

In Gowan Ring and Birch Book luckily have the same singer/songwriter writing the music and playing the same/similiar hand made guitars… Each band incorporates my favorite elements of folk music; wafting vocals, mellow guitar plucks, yummy accompaniment, gentle-soothing lyrics, 60’s style dress, and an overall free flowing sound — I’m not lying or over exaggerating when I compare them to Nick Drake or Marc Bolan acoustic.

 

A few years ago I saw them play a house show with Nick Castro and The Young Elders - who are equally praise-worthy, as was Devendra Banhart before he knew who Natalie Portman was.

 … Continue reading From Birch Book and In Gowan Ring to Natalie Portman in 108 words.

“Sid Vicious is a spoiled brat and his girlfriend is an asshole.”

Part One

 … Continue reading "Sid Vicious is a spoiled brat and his girlfriend is an asshole."

M. Lamar is proof: Something else is going on.

 

 

Hey! I was born in the eighties and have a difficult time remembering original and exciting music too. Except for a handful of bands, the majority of music that has been recorded in the past 20 years sounds like a lot of time in a focus group was responsible for its production. By and large this is tedious and boring and a major reason why MTV totally became shitty and George Bush remains elected.

 

Every once and awhile something completely new comes along that challenges and demands the listener to really engage with it. M. Lamar’s music does that. To say it’s great or bad or weird or fucked up or haunting or too much is too little…

 

M. Lamar reaches a depth through his music that is unparalleled by the vast majority of his contemporaries. Recently I saw him play a show in San Francisco; the first half of the show I nervously adjusted and readjusted myself in my seat. The second half of the show a light bulb burst in my brain and I was overwhelmed with respect and admiration for the poignant depictions of race, class, and sexuality his music addressed.

 

His show included old spiritual hymnals, reworks of classic folk songs and some original work.

 

Diamanda Galas said, “this bitch can sing!”… Continue reading M. Lamar is proof: Something else is going on.

The Widespread Reign of The Great Northwest

 

You know when you’re promoting yourself, like, how it can sometimes be pretty shameless? Especially when you don’t know how badly your shit sucks and no one will tell you? Well lately we (we as in, the weapon) have been contacted by a ton of bands/labels/friends about reviewing their music, and because I maintain a pretty lax environment I have to turn most of them down. Rarely do I have to say no because the music is awful. It’s usually because A. I don’t have time to write, like, EVER, and B. I don’t give assignments to Fantastic Weapon contributors. Lucky for you, me, and The Great Northwest, someone sent me something that I dug so much I was moved to make time for it. This one here’s a gem and I’m stoked to introduce you to it:

 

 

The Great Northwest is the brain child of Brian Coates and comes to you straight from where its name suggests - Portland, OR. This project owes its life to shameless self-promotion.… Continue reading The Widespread Reign of The Great Northwest

Dent May and His Magnificent Ukulele pay tribute to Parisian Girls in Mississippi

Remember when rock was young? When crooners still stole hearts? When young dancers lost themselves beneath bright lights? Then dig the nostalgia of Dent May and his Magnificent Ukulele. Dent has tapped into the magic of Elvis Costello, Roy Orbison, Belle and Sebastian, The Jesus and Mary Chain, and all that bustling, French, cafe music you hipsters download onto your ipods and listen to while lounging naked in your bedrooms. Dent May makes the romantic sounds of summer love. His songs hang ten on the same waves that The Beach Boys surfed after long summer nights at parties in Venice Beach. He will make you think of Jonathan Richman circa The Modern Lovers. Oh but hey–… Continue reading Dent May and His Magnificent Ukulele pay tribute to Parisian Girls in Mississippi

The Rolling Blackouts, Beat Union, and The Selector: I loved the beat once, too.

 

 

Ok so maybe I’m drunk.
Whatever.
That isn’t the point and it was never the point. The point is one of three things, and I haven’t decided which. At least not yet.

 

Let’s figure it out together!

 

• 1. Why did I find Vol. 1 Issue 1 of LA Record (that would be the first EVER…) on the corner of a street in echo park tonight? I was just minding my own business, and I saw a piece of paper, and I was like, “Oh hey, it’s an old LA Record…” and it just happened to be the first one ever. I’m sure I probably had like a gazillion copies of this when it first came out because my friends used to write for them, but dude, seriously, what the hell are the chances of something like that happening? Ever? Cause like, they’ve totally changed the whole format and I’ll be honest - shit is kinda taking itself too seriously these days. It used to be cool when you’d get some random piece of paper that turned out to be a poster with a huge picture of the Rolling Blackouts dressed like the New York Dolls. Even though I never liked the Rolling Blackouts much,

The Lemurians will give you serious anxiety.

 

If you’re human like me, watching/listening to The Lemurians will give you serious anxiety. These “guys” are supposedly “humanoid visitors ” from a “distant planet” who frequently “hang out” in “the fifth dimension” and have been living amongst us for thousands of years.

 

OH REALLY? Well then what the fuck have they been doing all this time?… Continue reading The Lemurians will give you serious anxiety.

Bruno and the Dreamies, Marcel Proust, and Dream Drool.

 

 

After creating and mastering a short lived but very seedy club persona, Marcel Proust went on to write many sentences; he very famously wrote, “If a little dreaming is dangerous, the cure for it is not to dream less but to dream more, to dream all the time.” Then he went in search of more dreams. Dreams are the images, thoughts, and feelings experienced while asleep, associated in particular with rapid eye movement (R.E.M.). The contents and biological purposes of dreams are not fully understood, though they have been a topic of speculation and interest throughout recorded history.

 

Raving and dreaming.

 … Continue reading Bruno and the Dreamies, Marcel Proust, and Dream Drool.